Garden of Spam
In addition to the usual crop of generic spam I receive every day, including the Nigerian Bank Scam, Penis enlargement and viagra offers, and Kathmandu Temple Kiff, I was delighted to find this nugget in my mailbox today:

From: xxxx@bluesky.com
Subject: Time travelers PLEASE HELP!!!!!!

If you are a time traveler or alien disguised as human and or have the technology to travel physically through time I need your help!

Also if you are from any of the following planets and can help me as mentioned please reply: Vadikar, Nefarious,Tralfamadore, Valnator, Travers, Edenad

I come to you for help, and need a way of doing this in the following way exactly in such a way that there will be little or no danger. I come to you in peace. Trust and honesty is an absolutely must!!

My life has been severely tampered with and cursed. I have suffered tremendously and am now dying! I need to be able to:

Travel physically back in time.

Rewind my life (including my age).

Be able to (remember what I know now) so that I can prevent my life from being tampered with again after I go back.

I am in great danger and need this immediately!

Only if you are a time traveler or nice alien and have this technology please send me a (separate) email to:

yyyyy@aol.com

Thanks

(email names changed to protect the innocent spammer.

moderngypsy @ 2001-12-05 17:10
*LAUGHS!!!*

Like we'd tell him anything.

*ahem*

kiyotei @ 2001-12-05 17:14

psychic sidekicks

Well girl,

Those of us who really can tell the future, and travel back in time, will keep our secrets to ourselves!

:-)

Take care wandering gypsy-faire

kiyotei
(not from planet X)

Re: psychic sidekicks

That's what I meant, dearie.

You mean that wasn't you on the ship with me this last Tuesday?

er...mistaken identity. Prank call! Prank call!

----e

astro pup
You mean the . . .shhhhhhhhh . . . spaceship?
Yeah that was me.

I believe I had a good time but I think they left the probe inserted!!!!

Turn your decorder ring to vector C4-delta and hang a giblet from your front porch tonight.

I'll be in touch.
Roger, over, and out.

kiyotei
(surfing with the aliens)

Re: astro pup
Roger that, over.

There may be some interFereNce frOm the thing made of tinfoil that the illuminati seems to have placed oveR my Door. STOP. Removing it is unadvisable. STOP. Cow mutilations imminent. STOP.

----e

"Spaceship Ryxi 5, are you there? This is Zizzer Jax on the earth planet. Come in captain Claypole..."

"What are your coordinates?"

"I have just landed on this small planet called earth."

"She keeps hanging up!"

They got to you, too!

----e

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